I have vivid memories of growing up in a house with a scale in every bathroom.
It was common place.
I remember my Mom remarking on her weight quite regularly and followed suit myself, as a budding pre-teen. Not long after, the scale standing became a daily ritual and then an obsession that found me standing on the scale many times a day. I can still feel the expectation in my gut, wondering what the scale would tell me about myself that day, and whether or not I would need to work harder to keep the numbers low or to lower them even more. So as to ask that mirror on the wall, I found myself, at a very young age, asking the scale to tell me how good I looked and how I should feel about myself.
When we give a numeric value the power to tell us how we are doing, it is as though we take the power that began as ours, and give it away. Instead of tuning inwards and asking ourselves: “how am I doing today?”, we ask the scale to tell us.
One of the most amazing and transformational tools in recovering from a dysfunctional past with food is to remove the scale. This can be a very scary and uncomfortable process (I know, I’ve been there), but one that is critical to healing and recovery, and one that will set the individual free from dependence on numerical value for self-worth.
Standing on scales, comparing weight to others, and counting calories in our food, are all old ways of managing weight. AND NONE OF THEM WORK. Not only do they not work, but they are damaging practices to the self-confidence, self-love, and self-worth of any individual. Is knowing how much you weigh important for some things? Sure. But jumping on the scale every morning and/or night, worrying constantly about what that number says, and often feeling bad about yourself because of it - IS NOT.
For some of us, more than others, we have a troubled relationship with food, whether past or present. For this special crew of people, the scale does more damage than it does good and this is an important acknowledgement to make. If, for you, like me, having a scale around tends to contribute to anxiety and self-doubt, sadness and lack of confidence, the scale is not a useful tool and will not support you in your health goals.
Take back your power.
Supported Ways to Let Go of the Scale
Wean Yourself Off: Always, when making changes to habits, the most effective approach is to take small steps away from your current habit and replace it with something else. You may want to try only getting on the scale once every 2 days at first, while simultaneously adapting some of the other supportive approaches below, then you may feel as though you could try only stepping on the scale once per week, and so on. Perhaps you want to put a little love note to yourself on your scale to remind you of your goal to let it go, something like: “your beauty is not measured by numbers”. You may also want to adopt another bathroom ritual to replace the scale standing (self love proclamations, moisturizing, or dry brushing). Regardless, make the transition slowly and purposefully so that you can stay focused on your goals and the path that will help you forward.
Shift Your Mindset: Mindset has everything to do with how successful you will be at changing your habits. Try adopting the mindset that you will be ok without the numbers on the scale; that those numbers can not tell you how you feel about yourself; that you can possess confidence and self love and acceptance without knowing your exact weight. Start this process by simply thinking about it. You may want to write about it in your journal or talk it through with a trusted friend. Keep this mindset shift at the forefront of your thoughts and try to come up with a few key phrases to remind yourself of the shifts you want to make: “I am beautiful no matter my weight”, “I want to set myself free from the scale”, “I want to find self-worth without attaching it to the scale”, etc.
Support Your Emotional Self: If the scale has had a strong hold on you for a long time, you will need emotional support in detaching from it. Grounding practices, embodiment, journalling, meditation, yoga, breath work, or any other connective practices can be imperative to support you through change. Take the time to work on your connectivity and practice being in-tune with your deeper self and supporting your mind-body connection in as many ways as you can.
Find an Accountability Partner: Making change takes dedication and courage. Finding a friend to make the change with you can help to support you both in positive growth. Talk to a friend or two, who you know struggle in similar ways that you do, and see if they will join you in your new goal. Together you will have strength and accountability that you may not be able to find on your own.
Work with a Professional: Of course, when making any habit or behavioural shifts in your life, working with someone who knows how to guide and support you and has the tools and experience to truly lead you towards progress, is one of the best ways to ensure success. If you know stepping away from the scale will be a very difficult hurdle for you, you may want to seek out a professional that can really be there for you throughout your journey.
Sometimes, the best way forward is to let go of what is holding us back.
If the scale is not serving you, it is time to set yourself free.
If this is something you feel you would like support with, feel free to reach out to me and find out how we can work together ♥️